-Day one of Gluten Free-
Well, this morning I went and talked to my Dietitian.
My Endo had sent off blood work to the Mayo Clinic
and it came back twice as high as it needs to be positive for
Celiac. I had the Upper Endoscopy and that was inconclusive-
some stuff yes but not as much as it is for most people.
What she wants me to do is stay on the gluten free diet
until Nov 12 when she will take blood and see if it made
a difference to decide if I have it or not. Sigh. Two and a half months.
I have been type 1 for 33 years and honestly I don't remember feeling
as upset, depressed or deprived as I am feeling right now. How can I
completely and so drastically change.
My friend Andrea went with me to Walmart and we checked at what they had
that was gluten free. Gosh. A lot more than I thought but we had no idea that
there was so much gluten in almost everything! It helped having her look
with me. It made looking kind of fun. She said she is going to help me with
making some gluten free Biscoff so I am hunting for recipes online.
With my pump I can eat healthy of course but I can also
eat what I want and I know what works for me and how to
handle my Diabetes. Now I feel completely undone. I
came home this morning and looked in my pantry and fridge and
thought, 'There is nothing at all I can eat in the house.' So, I
didn't eat. My coffee is okay and my fav sugar free coffee
creamer says gluten free, at least that is one good thing. Phew. I love
my coffee and fav creamer.
All this to say I am feeling so completely overwhelmed and
numb. How am I ever going to do this??
My fam has no idea how much this is going to make
everything and I mean everything very very different for all
of us.
the life and times of a coffee loving, picture taking mom
Tuesday, August 27, 2013
Friday, January 11, 2013
Unexpected Sweet Joys
My post on Facebook today:
'It
is going to be 65 degrees out there today and back cold tomorrow -
I've got to get outside!'
What
an unexpected joy it was to walk outside and feel sweet spring-like
breezes and hear birds singing happily as the sun warmed us all.
We
went to visit my Dad (who is the best Dad in the world and I am so blessed to have him) and took a moment to run over to the little lake
there at Maranatha.
I
met a woman there named Dorothy. She had a sweet little toy poodle
named Barbie. The calmest quietest small dog I have ever seen. I
enjoyed hearing about her dog's talent for pet therapy ministry and how she
and her husband were in the military. She's been here less than a
year and really misses her dear husband who died a couple of years
ago. She was from Massachusetts and she reminded me a lot of my
mom's sister Dorothy. Another unexpected delight today.
Of
course since we live in Springfield MO the variable weather capital
of the US, it is going to be cold again tomorrow and sleeting and
snowing on Sunday.
I'll
enjoy the memories of today's sweet joys anyway and look for more in my every day, I just might be surprised.
Thursday, January 10, 2013
Laughing after midnight(well almost)
Why is it that we laugh the hardest and
act the silliest after 11pm when Brent is trying to sleep?
It started happening when my son got in the teenage years and continues growing as if it had a life of its own.
We try to keep quiet but it bursts out
in irrepressible laughter over the strangest things.
I am not sure why this started but I am thankful for
times of laughter and fun with my kids as the stress of the day has
faded away and we are mellowing down (as it were) for the night. That is not a bad thing, laughter shared bonds us in special ways.
One
night Brent came out and said, “Am I missing all the fun again?”
and I smiled and said “No, you aren't missing it, jump in!”
And
he did.
That was one of the best nights of all.
Wednesday, January 9, 2013
Choices make the real you
~Until
God opens the next door, praise Him in the hallway~
posted
by www.jcluforever.com
on Facebook today. Go look at their beautiful Christian tees for
ladies!
I want this to be my first thought when....life happens.
How was your day today?
I had some great places
and a
few horrible spaces
but it ended up very good.
I was at New
Community at Central and Pastor Mike
(http://mikemccrary.blogspot.com) had us doing group discussions on 2
Peter 1:3-9.
I love how Peter gives us positive things we can do that
will help us grow:
'5 Do
your best to improve your faith. You can do this by adding goodness,
understanding, 6 self-control,
patience, devotion to God, 7 concern
for others, and love. 8 If
you keep growing in this way, it will show that what you know about
our Lord Jesus Christ has made your lives useful and meaningful.
'
So by adding
goodness,
understanding,
self-control,
patience,
devotion to God,
concern for others
and love -
I grow as a
Christian and as a real person.
These are all choices that I can make in any moment that
happens in my day.
It is not some magical, ethereal experience that is out
there on some higher spiritual plain but real nitty-gritty this is
where the rubber hits the road kind of stuff.
The kind of stuff I can put my teeth into, grab on and
run with. The kind of stuff that makes my real life and every
relationship I have better.
I like this.
Tuesday, January 8, 2013
The human element, that is so me
Another day and I am struggling with what to write. Here are my tired thoughts tonight.
This afternoon on the radio I heard the guy at the local Christian station said he was going to start 'hashtagging human element' after he started to play the same song twice in a row on his live show.
Here is what he wrote about it on facebook(btw, his name is Brenton Miles and the station is 99.5 hit fm- definitely worth listening): “Just talked about the #humanelement on the radio! It's okay to screw up... There is grace, kindness, and hope when you approach God, who understands the human element.”
His words really made me think. In all the 'trying to be more real' and 'faith moments' I forgot to mention that being human is what I am, what we all are. I long for my heart to be more like Jesus but I mess up and I do it badly and often. Perfection is not where I am at nor is it any place I hope to move.
I want to be real with the ups and downs, loud and strong, struggles and throwing my hands in the air in defeat, the hugs and the yelling, the laughter and the tears, and the throwing my hands in the air with praise for God too. It is all me. I hope it is all you too.
We cannot let discouragement keep us from struggling on and going forward. Yes, we mess up but we also have hope and another day, another moment, another choice to make. Don't give up. (Can you tell I am talking to myself?)
Where you are is good. It isn't where you will be tomorrow.
I wonder where this is leading me?
Learning and growing, laughing and living, and even the crying and struggling - bring it on.
Monday, January 7, 2013
Cold nights are for snuggling
Very cold tonight. In fact my house has been cold most of the day. I am tired of being chilled and January has barely begun.
China is so cold her fur has a ridge. Tigger is just enjoying sharing the warm spot next to her.
My kitties have the right idea, time to go snuggle with the one I love.
China is so cold her fur has a ridge. Tigger is just enjoying sharing the warm spot next to her.
My kitties have the right idea, time to go snuggle with the one I love.
Sunday, January 6, 2013
Second Chances
mulling present participle of mull (Verb)
Verb
|
|
Saturday, January 5, 2013
Faith moments
Faith
moments
Do
you ever have them?
Those
moments that can clarify and show you where you are growing in your
faith and as a person or falling flat on your face and missing it.
When
I see someone in line at Wendy's counting out pennies with their
husband talking about how hungry they are and they buy one small
chili to share and I look at them, look away, look again and then I
take money I was going to spend on going to the movies and buy them
more food to eat......
When
I stop and listen instead of hurrying away when a friend is telling
me her problems at home......
When
someone asks me to pray for them and I say, “Sure” and walk away
and never remember......
When
my son says, “No one wants to spend time with me anyway” and I go
to him and make sure he knows how much I treasure him and want to
spend time with him no matter how he is feeling......
Those
moments – how are yours?
Friday, January 4, 2013
Where is Faith taking you?
Somebody
wrote:
“No
Regrets, just lessons. Life is too short.”
Well,
I agree that life is too short, I see that everyday when I look at my
son and see how much he has grown and wonder where the time has gone.
The
'no regrets' part? No one I have ever met has said they have no
regrets at all, except my Dad. He says he walked through every door
the Lord opened and looks back on his 96 ½ years and honestly can
see nothing he would change or could have done better.
I
wish I could say that. There are so many things I wish I'd done
differently, made better choices, been less afraid, been more loving,
more courageous, less lazy.
I
believe every single thing we experience can be a lesson.
Not
the kind of lesson where we sit and listen to the teacher and take
notes and have tests.
Not
the kind of lesson where we listen and maybe daydream a little during
the talk, smiling and agreeing that is a good point and then go home
and forget what we heard.
Not
a 'lesson' I learned in Sunday School or Bible college.
These
are the kinds of lessons where the rubber meets the road, where I
learn to walk out what I say I believe in the real moments of my
life.
The
places where faith becomes real.
The places I become real.
Thursday, January 3, 2013
Living by Faith so why do I blog?
So
what do I want this blog to be about?
Maybe
I should have written about this the first day, but here goes.
The
name says it all - Living by Faith.
It
is kind of a play on words. I want to write about my christian faith
and what it means to me but I also want to write about my life,
living by Faith: my life and times, the journey I find myself on, what living is about wherever it finds me.
I
want to write about my family and my friends, about my joys and my
sorrows, my struggles and falling flat on my face and getting up
again to try another day and hopefully find some peaceful moments
along the way.
I
want to be real and transparent. Sometimes I wonder if I even
understand what that means, if anyone does.
So
come and join me on this journey, I will look for you along the way.
Wednesday, January 2, 2013
Peace, Happiness and Reality
9:30pm
I'm
really dragging right now but figured out it isn't because anything
is wrong. I'm just really tired. Good to know it is just that. I
couldn't fall asleep last night because so much was on my mind.
Hopefully I will be tired enough tonight that won't be a problem.
I've
decided that I am determined to be a seeker of the Truth. Driven. I
will find an answer.
Tonight one thing I heard at church was that we need to 'apply' the
Word, walk it out in our lives. I am determined to keep growing and
learning and seeking. Part of that is being closer in my walk with
God. Part of that is learning more about what it is to be human and
what it is to be me. Just Faith.
I
want to live my life in peace. If the people around me are angry I
not only don't have to respond in anger but I can still be peaceful
and happy letting their stuff be their stuff.
Today
on Facebook Joyce Meyer said, “Nobody else is in charge of your
happiness except you.”
A
few weeks ago my reaction would have been, 'Yeah, right. You have no
idea what my life is like.'
Today
those words are very freeing. I just need to figure out how to let
their stuff be their stuff.
Does
that mean ignoring them or acting like I don't care? No, not at all.
I think caring doesn't mean I have to let someone's words stab my
heart and make me miserable.
Sometimes
those words that someone says carelessly will stab my heart no matter
what I think or want or how much I am trying to be in charge of my
own happiness. The reality is that being in a relationship can hurt
me just as much as the love in the relationship is healing and
fulfilling. Relationships are just hard sometimes and maybe it is
perspective I need in all of this. I want to be happy. I don't want
to be miserable. I can choose to care and be a loving and forgiving
person. Sometimes I will be hurt. But the giving and loving and
learning and growing we do together is more than that. Relationships
are worth it.
I
want my life to mean something and often I have thought it didn't and
believed a lot of people think that about me too.
I
want to make a difference and often I have felt powerless to do more
than tread water and try to survive.
I
want to live in peace.
That
doesn't mean that I won't take a stand when it matters.
I
will.
That
doesn't mean that I will be dishonest about my feelings or yours and
put on a 'Everything is wonderful because Jesus Loves me' t-shirt and
never admit my struggles.
No,
my struggles are real, like yours, and painful and hard but they are
not all I am or all I will ever be.
I
can be honest if I have the courage to let you see the real me, and I
will be.
Tuesday, January 1, 2013
2013 A new year - a new beginning - a fresh start
2013
I feel new hope this morning. Not sure why.
Something about new beginnings and new hope call to me and give me inspiration and hopefully the energy I need to make some changes in my life.
I want peace.
I am tired of every day of my life having someone be angry in some way. I cannot change the people around me, their stuff is their stuff. BUT I wonder if there is a way to not be so hurt by their anger, to let it just be theirs and keep a peaceful heart and outlook in my own heart and life. I wonder. I haven't been able to do this so far. I think that people who say it is possible and write about it glibly have no idea what living with someone who has anger issues is like. But I want a new start and I am looking for a change.
I want peace, I want to be creative, I want to make a difference, I want to encourage others.
I am going to find a way to do and to be all that I can be. No wait that is a commercial. LOL But I am going to find a way. I am tired of living in maintenance mode, too much of my life has been wasted doing that.
I am going to take steps toward the life I want to have. God please give me the wisdom and the energy to go there.
When people around me are angry and yelling I tend to retreat and hide. I don't want to attack back but I do want to be able to stand tall and look them in the eye and let them know I don't like that and that they can talk to me when they are done yelling.
I think we all need lessons in how to manage our anger – it seems to be a world-wide problem.
I saw this on Facebook today and it really spoke to me. This is what I want for my life, my 2013 and this and every moment I have left on this earth.
Here we are celebrating the new year with our sparkling grape juice.
I feel new hope this morning. Not sure why.
Something about new beginnings and new hope call to me and give me inspiration and hopefully the energy I need to make some changes in my life.
I want peace.
I am tired of every day of my life having someone be angry in some way. I cannot change the people around me, their stuff is their stuff. BUT I wonder if there is a way to not be so hurt by their anger, to let it just be theirs and keep a peaceful heart and outlook in my own heart and life. I wonder. I haven't been able to do this so far. I think that people who say it is possible and write about it glibly have no idea what living with someone who has anger issues is like. But I want a new start and I am looking for a change.
I want peace, I want to be creative, I want to make a difference, I want to encourage others.
I am going to find a way to do and to be all that I can be. No wait that is a commercial. LOL But I am going to find a way. I am tired of living in maintenance mode, too much of my life has been wasted doing that.
I am going to take steps toward the life I want to have. God please give me the wisdom and the energy to go there.
When people around me are angry and yelling I tend to retreat and hide. I don't want to attack back but I do want to be able to stand tall and look them in the eye and let them know I don't like that and that they can talk to me when they are done yelling.
I think we all need lessons in how to manage our anger – it seems to be a world-wide problem.
I saw this on Facebook today and it really spoke to me. This is what I want for my life, my 2013 and this and every moment I have left on this earth.
Here we are celebrating the new year with our sparkling grape juice.
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